ONEYEARONEYEARONEYEARONEYEARONEYEARONEYEARONEYEARONEYEARONEYEARONEYEARONEYEAR



Can't wait for us to be ONE YEAR! I don't care how much I'm gonna suffer or get myself killed
 I want us to be together for ONE YEAR!



Decision.

I've never been acting like this before. So many words. So many thinking in my mind. At certain times, I feel like my head is exploding.

Why do I even want to make myself suffer like this? Listening to all the advices from friends. It wasn't the same at the beginning. Now, they all make the same conclusion.

But, I still can't make any decision. I feel lonely. Even there are so many people around me, without you, I still feel lonely.

I feel like, my heart has been torn into pieces and I'm trying to get every pieces back together. and we all know it is impossible. But I just couldn't give up.

I just wanna know, what are you thinking. You told me you love me, you are sorry for what you did. You know that you hurt me, but, you never do anything to stop it.

Day by day, the gap is going wider and wider. I really feel that, and I know you feel it too.Why can't you do something about it?

Maybe, it was all because of me. I was the only one struggling in this relationship. Couldn't let you go. You even told me, you do not want to hurt me anymore and ask me let go of you. I still keep holding on.

Now, it's only the matter of time. Will I still be there trying to get back every pieces of my heart, for how long? Will I still be your SECOND priority? I feel so insulted.You're probably sick of these.

Somehow, I wish it is your decision, and not mine.

4.08am


I couldn't sleep.

I did not eat much.

I'm sick.

I'm tired of crying.



I don't wanna be in love anymore.



Oh. 2011?




Hello 2011. 2010 has been an asshole. Hope you won't be.

HAPPY NEW YEAR GUYS! <3




If your heart is wounded. It's troublesome. You would need love.

I've been giving out chances. So many times that I lost count. Do I deserve this?

Someone told me, I could find others that are better. All I have to do is let go.

Someone told me, if I don't love you anymore, I should let you go or else I will keep hurting you.

Thing is, I never said I don't. At least, not yet.

I think I've pushed myself onto the wall. There are no more space for me. I am. Sad.

Every time, I gave you a chance, you blew it off. The chances, they meant nothing to you.

Chance. I never give it out easily. Yet, it came back and stabbed my heart. So many times.

Because of you.

They said, if your flesh is wounded. You treat it easily with medicines or ointments.

But, if your heart is wounded. It's troublesome. You would need love.

Right now, I don't have it. And my heart is bleeding.

Can somebody help me? It hurts. No more tears are coming out. I don't know why.

Is this.. going to be what I was sooo afraid that it would be?

Will this be.. the end?